development in Pomona (DF, NYC)

Since moving to NY this is problably the longest i've been at my parents house (Chino Hills) and kicked it in Pomona: my hometown...
As I drive to my friend hector's pad for some futbol or to pick my sis up at the amtrack, I naturally feel nostalgic for my hometown. "Sunday" leaque soccer with men that should have hung up their cleats years ago, the house parties with the same 10 banda songs, coaching at pomona high, the pool hall on second street, etc...Yet, like many parts of Brooklyn and the historic center of Mexico City, "development" is coming to Pomona. Second street and its surrondings continues to see the opening of restaruants, galleries, and bars that cater to denizens from surrondings neighberhoods (read white and middle class). While on hold there is a current project to build condiminums for US (young educated professionals). As part of a cohort of educated, young, and liberal individuals I both enjoy and frequent second street, the historic center, and Brooklyn...Yet I am troubled that consumption is what passes and guides "development" in all of these areas. With consumption come higher rents and the slow displacement of the working class, . Sadly, I dont see a competing vision of "development" or even a hint of ambivalance/resentment/anger in those that partake in these activies. Intellectual bankruptcy?

Welcome to LA: Party with Chicano Dynasty…

On my first day back in Los Angeles, as can be expected, hit up a party on the Westside. Sis used to work at the Latino Theater Company (http://thelatc.org/about-2/latino-theater-company/), so we went to Jose Luis Valenzuela’s house for the annual Christmas party…Upon entering had the mandatory shot of patron, followed by frijoles, arroz, and tamales…and of course more drink: corona and pacifico all night…Walls covered with work of iconic chicano/a artist…Drank some more headed come, talked to some old school chicano/as... Good first night. 

Los Angeles for turkey break

The sun gently entered my brother’s room, reminding me of my promise to run in the morning…Fuck, they are staring at me, taunting me, their too pristine to be running shoes. I get up, slip them on and head to the park. As soon as I make it up the last step, the beautiful soccer field opens up, this is my sun rise. I stare for a few and then walk home. I need to buy some shades I tell myself. Fresh squeezed oj, eggs, and sis’s potatoes.

soccer on the pavement with los primos

, with mom, pops, and siblings in the park

with brother, hector, his brothers  on the turf

tio raymundos backyard, rancheras, relajo, and beers (maliciala)

house party in long beach, cumbias, tecate, and holding little (yet heavy) maximo.

 moc job talk for friend’s upcoming interview at UofA, tacos koreanos, al pastor, horchata

 pool hall from my high school days with hector, as in 1999, the doors, pink floyd, Santana, and los tigres blaring from the juxe box.

Palabra, chicano literary art journal

·      Burbank, seat 28b,

·      The 1 train-cross the Columbia campus, wind slapping my face,

·      hugs con caridad (home).  

It only gets harder.....

Year two of graduate school....

year one was a series of short races..

year two is a damn marathon: 

Classes, Taing, Mexican film series, conference organizing, starting/organizing a workshop on race and ethnicity....too much work. Not enough soccer, beer, or sandri.

Routing for Anyone but the Yankees (with negra modelo in hand)

The pundits point to numerous reasons for the dodger's inability to beat the Phillies. Anyone from LA who is on the east coast knows that it was not the lack of pitching or leaving the basses loaded (with 0 outs mind you). It was too damn cold, plain and simple. It wasn't snowing, but it was too damn cold to be outside. Covered in blankets, with the heater on, and the windows closed, I slowly drank my beer. After I finished my first, it was not thirst, but habit that drove me to get that second one. I contemplated changing course, maybe getting a shot of tequila, but everyone knows, you can't watch a dodger game without a nice cold on in hand. As the phillies started scoring, I realized we had no chance. When the game was finally over, I got another beer and mourned both the loss and the reality that winter is here. Those of you back home, no doubt were at least able to enjoy the loss, outside (the front or backyard), maybe a carne asada, and most likely with a few beers in a bucket of ice (not snow)...Kinda like going to the casino, you might lose your money, but at least they have the decency of giving you some drinks...

I can't change the weather, but I can kinda rout for the Angels. Deep down, they know its all about the dodgers, hence the name change: Los Angles Angels. We all know that to mimic is to flatter. As game time approaches, I'll be hoping that it magically gets warmer, not so the Angels can win, but so that I can watch the Angels' defeat with a nice cold one in hand. (its 50 and raining, with chance of more rain. Maybe the Yankees will slip?)

H20: a popular vision of water conservation

 

            After meeting with my professor, I headed to the centro of Cuernavaca to see the catedral. Built in the early 1500s, my professor mentioned that inside was a restored mural of Franciscans that headed to Japan with hopes of converting a few. They were converted into martyrs. Wow, I thought, no way I’m missing this….

Hailed a taxi and asked, “cuanto el cenrto?” Adalberto, the driver, said “25 pesos” and I was headed to see some old ass murals. As the wheels rolled, I frantically wrote, “conceptual work + historical question = justification of project. MUST DO SOON” on my hand. Breaking my important and professional historical to do list was Adaberto’s words: “ojala que llueva. Para la economía.” Not quite sure what he meant with “la economía,” I responded with, “Si verdad. Hace mucho calor, con el agua se pone fresco. Hay mas trabajo para ti cuando llueve?” “No, deja de de eso” he responded. After a short silence he narrated the following story, which I will attempt to portray as accurately as possible:

            No, lo que pasa es que este año esta muy mal. De todos los años que he vivido, este es el peor. Mis amigos sembradores estan sufriendo. Lo que pasa es que el rollo de el “global warming”. Un cilcón que siempre pasa no ha pasado. En estos tiempos que estamos mis hijas toman 20 minutos en el baño. Como nunca nos han cortado nuestra agua no saben lo que es no tenerlo. Tenemos suerte porque a nuestros vecinos si se las cortan. Yo un tiempo estuve en alcolicos anonimos y aprendí mucho. Solamente podiamos bañarnos una vez a la semana y solamente nos daban una botella de agua…de comer, solamente frijoles y arroz. Para dormir, el suelo…Uno de los alcolicos se enojó porque estaba enfadado de comer lo mismo todos los días, y se quejó. Y sabes que le dijerion? Que en su casa siempre tenía de comer, y claro agua para bañarese, y una cama para dormir...Pero por andar tomando nunca llegaba a cenar, a dormir, por andar pedo…En ese tiempo aprendí apreciar las cosas. Por eso les digo a mis hijas que en los tiempos que estamos en cinco minutes y ya..Pero no entienden. Como vez…

            We need to put average Americans in rehab: SUVS, buffet breakfast, lunch, and dinner, grass filling every possible inch of campuses, front lawns, and sprinklers that wet more than the grass needs to grow is ridiculous.

Desde Cuernavaca, Saludos            

La Linea Azul

 

10pm on a Sunday and the metro is still running, people are still riding, and too many are still trying to make a few pesos from friendly and giving passengers into many. No barefoot indigenous kids today, but plenty of others. A chavo enters with a guitar, the diverse stickers don’t display his taste in music or “style” but cover the many cracks and scratches. His guitar matches his faded and ripped jeans. His converse have no stickers to hide their wear. In a black short sleeve and with long black hair, his style is part choice part fortune: he is not one of the fortunate that dress down to look cool. After his first song comes to close he announces:  soy chico del barrio, te puedo robar tu celular, tu bolsa, tu cartera, pero prefiero tocar unas canciones. Tal ves no sea muy buenas, pero no te estoy robando. The second song, cada rosa tiene una espina. Before I slide my hand in jeans I know I only have 4 metro passes (totaling a mere 8 pesos) a two hundred peso bill which is suppose to last me another 3 days and two 50 cent pesos. So I start looking through by backpack, I must have a moneda de 10 o 5, algo mas que 2 pinche monedas de 50 centavos…I don’t. I hand him the 2 coins and I’m surprised when he utters a sincere chido carnal. We both exit at chabacano , I imagine he is on the blue line somewhere. He is about 10 yards in front of me and I see another person trying to accumulate some pesos: a blind lady, wooden stick in her right hand, transparent, plastic cup in her right. El Chavo del barrio, without hesitation pulls out his entire right jean pocket and places the several coins that he has earned through song in the transparent almost empty cup. We both walk downstairs, but he is able to enter the metro before the orange doors close. On the other side of the doors with my 200 pesos floating in pocket I think que me cuesta dar 200 pesos.

 

I finally get to the nativitas stop, walk for about 20 minutes, enter the large yard, say hi to Susan, the three year old dog, and enter my room. I turn on my laptop and I am immediately connected to another world. As my first day in Mexico becomes my 28^th I feel more and more uncomfortable in “nice” restaurants, bars, cafés. I don’t know if its the divide between los niños bien y el chavo de banda that bothers me or what I perceive to be the total indifference of los de la alta clase…..

WHy I root for El Tri: an Exploration of Pocho Mexican Nationalism

 

 

            August 12^th finally arrived. Wearing a Mexican national soccer team jersey from the 1998 world cup, blue jeans, a faded, thin soled, and black, white stripped samba’s, I exited my friend apartment on Durango street in Roma, cut across la plaza rio de janeiro, passed a large circular foundation, with a naked giant size David as its center pieces and headed towards the insurgentes metro. A little after lunch, the punks and other youth urban groups congregated at the la glorieta as usual. As the youths passed the time Mexicans of all ages rushed down into the metro taking the pink line towards observatorio or pantitlan. While the movement of Mexicans was normal, their faces revealed a strange mix of emotions. While Mexico has never lost to the United States in the Estadio Azteca and beat the Americans 5-0 in American turf just weeks past, the faces of Mexicans were void of the confidence that history should have provided them: history repeats itself we are told. Instead one sensed excitement and fear mixed with a hidden, but palpable optimism.

 

Heading towards pantitlan on the pink line, I exited San Juan de Letran at about 2:45, fifteen minutes before kick-off. After finally conquering the large flight of stairs, I made it to the street, turned right at Lopez Madero and entered my friend Daniel’s art deco apartment complex. He greeted me with “fuck man, we better not lose. Lets go find a bar” and a slap on my back, as if my optimism could change the outcome of the match. Heading toward the ostentatious Bellas Artes from calle Lopez we made a left at Madero and instantly became part of hundreds of Mexicans hurriedly making their ways to a television set. After several blocks we arrived at Salon Sol, directly below what used to be a hotel.

 

We found a spot at the bar, ordered beers and anxiously waited for the referee to blow his whistle. Before the ten-minute mark our fears were confirmed, Mexico could indeed for the first time in the nation’s history lose to the United States in the Estadio Azteca. In the ninth minute Landon Donavon, by far the most hated of American athletes by Mexicans, played a through ball from the midfield to Davies, placing him within strides of Mexico’s 18-yard box. Davies received the ball in stride, dribbled for a few yards and beat the Mexican goalie by placing the ball side net, thus confirming Mexico’s fears. While the spectators in the bar seemed unnerved, the Mexican squad maintained its composure and was rewarded with a 25 yard shoot by Juarez that hit the crossbar before bouncing inside the goal. In the second half Mexico continued to play well, but a goal seemed like a distant possibility. Fortunately, with less than ten minutes remaining in the match, Juarez pushed the ball forward into the American eighteen-yard box, outrunning Donavon and forcing Jay Demirit to shift. Demirit’s slide tackle resulted in the ball bouncing directly in front of Mexican player Sabah. After taking a touch, he riffled the ball above Tim Howard’s hands setting off a celebration in the Estadio Azteca, bars and restaurants across Mexico and the United States.

 

 

We ordered another beer and watched the seconds turn into minutes, until eventually the referee blew the whistle. Smiling and tipsy we exited the bar and headed south, back towards Bellas Artes and Lopez Madero.  Excited and relieved I shouted “fuck man, we won. No mames, we fucken won.” Before “fucken won” left my lips and entered the airwaves, a Mexican in his early twenties shouted “eres mexicano por que hablas ingles.” I responded to Eres mexicano porque hables ingles with silence. No witty comeback. No defense of my actions. Those five words made me aware of my status as a Chicano celebrating a Mexican victory on Mexican soil. I was Mexican, I could celebrate the victory, but speaking the language of the enemy I could not. Celebrating in English, the language of the Americans, the day of Mexico’s victory and the day before the anniversary of the conquest of the Aztecs at the hands of the Spaniards must have placed me with the “Malinches” of Mexico. Adulterating his victory, unworthy of wearing Tonatiuh, the Aztec sun god, on my chest.

I should have uttered Mexico is a failed state! Mexicans have to migrate to the United State to support their families! It’s a failed state! My use of English to celebrate is merely a symbol of its failure, its continued failure! But I didn’t. He headed north and we headed south.

When we arrived to my friend's apartment he updated his facebook status from “Going to a Salon Sol to watch the U.S.A.-Mexico game! Completely torn right now” to “THE AZTECAS BEAT THE GRINGOS, 2-1, AT THE STADIUM OF DEATH. HORRAY!!” As he typed STADIUM OF DEATH, he asked “why do we root for the Mexican national team?” If my use of English confounded the Mexico City denizen, my Mexican nationalism and that of other Chicanos/Mexican-Americans and self-identifying pochos angers, annoys and confuses white Americans. Fans of Victor Davis Hanson, Samuel Huntington will reason that my sense of self is evidence of an effort to conquer the South Western United States. Opting for a logic that emanates from their racism and fear of losing a white national identity, they avoid feeling confused by my nationalism. What follows is for those of you on both sides of the US-Mexican border who are confused and wish to understand what I will proudly label pocho nationalism.

 

            As the son of migrant parents, grandson of two Braceros, I have benefited greatly from my legal status as an American. I received my college education from UCLA with  financial assistance from the government and government funded scholarships for minorities. Enjoying Mexico’s victory on top of the ancient land of the Aztecs and writing this piece at UNAM’s library on a Friday evening is funded by my current academic institution. I am privileged, privilege that derives from my legal status: an American citizen.

            Yet I am constantly reminded that Mexicans and descendents of Mexicans, contrary to what our birth certificates and passports say, are not American. On my last trip to Los Angeles from Mexico City, the border agent looked at my passport, then looked at me, looked at me a little longer and then asked what I was doing in Mexico. Already suspect, I replied, “research.” “Really,” he said, “what’s your occupation.” “I’m a graduate student,” I said, which was followed by him asking “where?” Before answering I thought shit, like he is going to believe this: “Columbia.” He looked at my passport again and waved me on. After me a White male showed his passport to the agent, the agent said, “welcome home” and waved him on. Even this seemingly innocuous interaction with the state at the airport reveals the fragility of legal documentation. My passport is suspect because to Americans, Mexicans are suspect. Whether we were born in the United States yesterday or have been here for generations, we are always suspect and are always asked to proof our citizenship.

Yet, I am a privileged American. For my undocumented high school and college classmates, papers are a privilege they don’t have. Regardless of their length of time in the states, their future goals, they are denied access to a driver’s license, financial aid, and a place in the political or economic fabric of the United States. Can a nation that treats our brothers, cousins, neighbors, and friends with such inhumanity expect us to cheer for it, to cherish victory over a nation that is sadly “so far from god and so close to the United States?” Not in good faith.   

             But neither do I stand in solidarity with the Mexican state. My nationalism is not rooted in a belief of the benevolence of Mexican government or the myth that all Mexican are entitled to the same benefits. My family and friends are Mexican and being Mexican in the United States is something we constantly experience. The treatment of Braceros during the mid 20^th century, the consistent militarization of the border, the homicide of a Mexican male migrant in Pennsylvania by white youths, the recent homicide of a father and daughter in Texas, and the brutality of the minute men point to the danger of being Mexican in the United States. This history results in a Mexican nationalism based on solidarity with my fellow descendants of Mexicans. It is this combined with the cultural practices of my family that make me identify as a Mexican. As a Mexican from Pomona, California I will continue to celebrate Mexican victories over the United States in English and Spanish and in, across, and between the two nations. Will you join me?  

---

 Please see Daniel Hernandez's "Why its Ok for Hyphenated Mexicans to root for Mexican Soccer"  for a more ambivalent perspective at the fastertimes.com

 http://thefastertimes.com/mexico/2009/08/17/why-its-ok-for-hyphenated-americans-to-root-for-mexican-soccer/